Um yeah... of course things are different

My dad is getting ready to go to Arizona for golf school. He has done this a few times before- golf is kind of his obsession. He goes by himself. You know, so he can focus on the golf. We have joked to him in the past that he should invest in some Arizona real estate for when he retires. My mom used to tell him that since he stayed in STL with her for so long, that they could go wherever they wanted to when he retired. Now with Bailey here, not so much.

Funny how babies change everything, even when you swear they won't. I was crying the other night because I missed how my life used to be without Bailey- like sleeping late and leaving home at the spur of the moment, or making cards and not being interrupted by someone needing attention. Don't get me wrong, I love her so much and wouldn't trade this for anything, but sometimes I just want a break.

My dream would be for Jonathon to say, "Honey, why don't you take a break one night this week and let me watch Bailey." I mean, he'll let me have a break IF I ASK or make plans and tell him he's watching her. But it would be nice for him to offer.

Today at my nursing group, we were all talking about this. I know moms in general don't get much of a break, but I think especially if you are breastfeeding- even if you're away, you have to worry about the baby having bottles, or making sure you can pump or won't leak... and lately we have the issue of Bailey being mad if she can't nurse before bed, so now Jonathon hates putting her to sleep. Ug

This has gotten really rambly and complainy so I'm stopping. I don't even know what I was trying to say, except that I was thinking about how much things have changed. Duhhhh